July 27th, 2016 – cont.
Gen slammed the door shut, squinting her eyes at Jessica as she left. It was like she was trying to throw daggers at Jessica with her mind. I stood there awkwardly, thrown in the mix.
“So, stake-out?” I offered, trying to cut the tension.
Gen’s face instantly changed from angry to amused, “oh, we’re going to catch this bitch and I already have a plan. It’s pretty simple. I’m going to have wings tomorrow. I’ll douse my wings in capsaicin hot sauce and then dust it with chili powder,” Gen said.
“What,” I replied, “what is capsaicin?”
“The hottest hot sauce,” she replied, “it’s hotter than ghost peppers. And it’s odorless. They won’t see it coming, er, smell it coming.”
“Don’t you think that a little…extreme?” I replied.
“Mass, lunch-stealers are right up there with car thieves and bank robbers. It’s the most passive-aggressive way to say ‘I don’t respect other people’s property!'”
“What if they puke or like, die?” I replied.
Gen sighed, “they probably won’t get past the first few bites. Besides, I don’t like when people mess with me. What do you do when people step on your toes?”
I shut my mouth. I’m really not one to talk, but then I remembered we are trying to find out who the thief is not set their mouth on fire.
“Wait,” I said, “but how is this going to help you find out who is stealing your lunch?”
“Did we not just have this conversation a minute ago? Get back to work!” Jessica reappeared out of nowhere.
“I’m on my ten-minute, boss,” Gen replied.